I’ve been writing regularly again for a while now, diverse topics, whatever has sprung into my brain at the time. But at the moment I’m not sure why I’m doing it.
I suspect I know why it’s not working for me.
Maybe it’s because I have a cold and am grumpy.
Maybe it’s because writing hasn’t really unearthed any great insights for me.
Maybe it’s because while writing is part of what I need to do, it’s not everything.
Maybe it’s because I’m impatient about whatever is next.
And I just feel as if writing is getting me nowhere in particular. It’s not getting my voice heard. It’s getting a few observations out there, but nothing earth-shattering that anyone is going to care about. It’s not really simplifying my mind or decluttering my head because there’s always something getting added to those thoughts in my head.
I suppose if writing is thinking, then at least I’m doing that. But too much thinking is not useful for an introvert like me, I just talk myself out of things, or write lists.
I do need to write. But maybe not like this. Maybe this isn’t what I’m meant to do with writing anymore. I get fed up with all that information on social media, all those posts everywhere, sometimes with mind numbing irrelevance. So why be the author of another unnecessary piece of communication?
Perhaps I just need to take action in another direction, decide to stop or continue with projects, and get out and talk to more people again. Keep exploring what’s out there, keep looking for projects that say “Hell, yeah,” to me (to quote Derek Sivers).
Stop kidding myself that what I’m writing here does anything for anyone other than me. And not even for me at the moment.
Yes, so I’m grumpy and tired. I’m in need of a break. Maybe that’s it. Maybe once the cold has vanished and my energy has returned I’ll be brimming with excitement about the world of blogging and the necessity of writing.
And maybe I won’t. We’ll have to see.
OK so it wasn’t quite that rainy today, but still a bit grey and miserable.…