I’m “between projects” right now.
At the start of the year I was doing some medical communications bits, waiting for something else to come to fruition.
Then I focused on untangling ideas – how could I take that service to more people, what would I need to do?
Lockdown happened, and I combined little bits of the above with childcare. For 3 months.
I’ve discovered that I can actually think of creative things to do with my 3 year old. I’m now really efficient at getting out the paints and paper and brushes, supervising the painting, and putting everything away while making sure her dirty hands only smear their paint on the sink in the downstairs toilet! I’ve also realised that she’s quite happy with a bowl of flour and a spoon on her little table in the kitchen, or a tray of sand and some nearby sticks or water – each of which can keep her entertained for half an hour.
As the end of our period of staying together at home approached, I started thinking about what I was going to do next.
I currently have space for something new. More than one thing perhaps. As well as the backlog of life admin and two tax returns of course. So as often happens, I find myself drawn to writing on my blog to think about what I want to do.
For me, blogging is part of my own thought process, which happens best in writing. Some people have hand written journals, some write ‘morning pages’ (see Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way), some have a digital diary, and many of us have blogs.
A blank page is a scary thing. There’s nothing on it, and no indication of where to start, what to say.
But there is always something there, a tiny little thought at the back of my mind wanting to get out. It may not have been able to emerge because there was something else in the way, other thoughts, or many things on a list to do perhaps.
So by starting to write, just typing anything, forming sentences, it somehow brings out those thoughts. They don’t always go in the direction I expected them to, maybe they meander around a bit first. But starting with a blank page seems to be a good method.
I feel like there might be room for a new creative project, as well as a bigger work project of some kind. A series of photos and posts on Instagram perhaps. Not a new blog – I’ve tried that many times and I always come back to this one, as an eclectic collection of everything that is part of me.
More blogging maybe. If I allow myself the time to feel inspired I can write a few posts a week, although it’s rarely sustainable beyond a few weeks.
Whatever it is, the more I blog, the more ideas will come to me, the more little sparks will ignite in me to indicate the direction I want to go in next.
As ever it’s the beauty of being a freelancer, with the experience of going through this cycle many times over – work then rest and think, then work again, always trying new things, always writing about them to make sense of them.
That’s why I write. To make sense of my world.
And I share some of it on a blog because I know that sometimes it’s useful to other people too – whether right now or sometime in the future. I hope that this post is one of those.